My Mexican Parents Taught Me to Take Up Space

The American Dream is alive and well because I’m living it as a first generation Mexican American woman, raised by parents from Michoacán Mexico. I can honestly say that lived experience and being motivated to grow beyond hardship has propelled me to become a business owner and am blessed to be able to change the lives of thousands of public health professionals. For Hispanic Heritage Month, I wanted to give credit to my Mexican parents for raising a fearless independent Latina who shined a bright light on me from the day I was born and showed me the way to live a fulfilling and meaningful life. 

 

My mom and dad unfortunately argued often, but the one thing they always agreed on was the importance of their 6 childrens' education. This mutual agreement between them blows my mind to this day, because while growing up in a poor rural town in the Central San Joaquin Valley, I knew other families were making their kids work as young as 10 years old as a farmworker or ended up dropping out of high school due to selling drugs or teen pregnancy. My parents unilaterally encouraged us to never give up on our studies, attend school every day, take up all the extra credit, and turn in homework on time. But here’s the crazy thing - mis padres tenian razon. My parents were right! Staying away from drugs, gang members, cholas, and boyfriends while loading up on homework and house duties was their way of protecting and raising us to be successful and highly independent adults. And honestly, this principle of putting education first has paid off as my siblings and I all have well paying jobs, growing families, and are homeowners. While education was crucial, church was just as important as school. 

 

Not many of us talk about faith in the educational space. I think we separate science and God in many ways, but there is no denying the power of a larger force that guides and protects us on a daily basis. But listening to El Padre en misa was harder to sit through than a classroom lesson on fractions. Here I was as a little girl in matching bows and dresses with my sisters, attending Catholic church every Sunday in Dinuba, California looking forward to the singing more than anything else. Nonetheless, my parents can rest assured the messages were heard eventually.

 

My parents sacrificed beyond anything I could have ever anticipated, but they trusted it was worth it for my siblings and I. So much so that my father was willing to risk going to prison for marijuana trafficking across the Mexican border because that’s how he was providing for us. I’ll never forget sharing a vending machine cheesecake with my dad at age 14 while we visited him at Corcoran Federal Prison, he was so skinny back then that I remember wanting to feed him. May he rest in peace and hope he’s proud of us. He wanted me to be a doctor, especially after having attended a Stanford PreMed program, but I think he would also be proud of how I’m helping others get jobs and get ahead. I followed God's path after all. 

 

My father’s fearlessness and my mother’s grit make up who I am today. My mother was always reminding us that we deserve to be in the room and if we aren't in a specific room yet, it's only a matter of time when we will be. My parents were very humble and didn't have friends in high places, they focused more on making their own path. They took up space where they wanted for their family, for the sake of our growth, my parents were willing to remind us that we live in America and that we can dream. Ultimately, I realized that taking up space meant that if not you, then who? They knew we were smart, resourceful, and dedicated to anything we put our minds to. They were proud parents - period. So much so that they named me Zoila Reyna - translation "I am the queen". 

 

In essence, they knew each and every one of us deserved a chance at a good life. It hasn't been easy, but I can honestly say this fearlessness and grit has helped me discover my talents and take risks all on my own as I grew my public health career and even when I decided to settle with my family in Los Angeles, CA. And while my spouse and my public health skills have encouraged me to become the woman-led business owner you see today, I know the mental strength and risk tolerance of putting myself out there and taking up space as an authority in career coaching comes from my parents' undeniable belief that I deserve to take up this space and if not me, then who?

 

So if you are also a first generation Hispanic college graduate, stretch your wings and soar! You don't have to have all the answers, but along the way, you will sense what's right for you. You will learn to pick your battles but more importantly, you will learn to pick the rooms you want to belong in. Cheers to you and your success!